Parenting Simplified – Emotionally & Mentally Happy Parents and Kids

Parents – Do you remember that Every Child is Unique

Yes, I am talking about the cliched adage “Every Child is Unique” today. Especially during this pandemic, I had noticed that most of the parents use this adage only when it suits them, but internally keep comparing their child to every other kid whose parents have posted something on the social media.

As a parent, I can very well understand the feeling each parent carries internally in their hearts. They want everyone in the family and even in the friend’s circle to praise and talk about their kids. This pressure is self-built within parents due to the constant comparison with other kids in the neighborhood.

Every Child is Unique

How many times, we would have asked our toddler and even kids to a certain extent to dance to a tune, or sing a rhyme or tell a shloka or recite a story in front of the guests, without even bothering to check whether the kid is in the mood for that impromptu stage show or not. We might say that we are not comparing our kids, but are only asking them to exhibit their talents. But asking them to do impromptu shows like this continuously adds pressure and stress on the kids. They start comparing themselves with the others who are not performing or even perform better than them. In the meanwhile, the other kids who are not performing will start losing their self-confidence, as no one is praising them. So that way, we are doing double harm to our kids unknowingly itself.

Every child has unique characteristics and traits. So as parents, we need to celebrate their uniqueness, enjoy and cherish it. But, we are comparing them with other kids and pushing them into the competitive world at an early age itself.

Why Every Child is Unique?

Developmental factors: Every child reaches the developmental milestones at their own time. The way, we show patience while our child tries to learn crawling and walking, we need to show similar patience in other areas as well.

Different Temperaments: Every child is born with their own temperament and the way they react to their surroundings and people. Some kids are very easy to raise, whereas few others would be very challenging.

Different strengths and weaknesses: Research shows that we all have different abilities and different types of Intelligence. Each individual uses them differently and they do develop differently for everyone. So we can’t really compare one person to the other.

Different Learning styles: Based on how the different bits of intelligence have formed in the brains of the kids, they learn in different ways.

Tips to Celebrate the Child’s Uniqueness:

Every Child has a Different Learning Style and Pace. Each Child is…
Source: Google

Instill the confidence in the Kids that they are Unique and different

First of all, we as parents should tell our kids that they are really different from their peers and special to you. You really admire his unique qualities with all the mistakes and pitfalls too. Once the child gets this confidence, then he would be able to work on his special talents and hone them.

Read Inspiring Books together:

While reading these books together with the children, they will be able to understand how these successful and inspiring people have used their shortcomings in a better way to achieve what they had desired.

Never speak negative about him in front of him.

This is the toughest part of parenting, as in most cases when we are pushed to the corner by kids we try using the negative talk to scare them. But we need to control our impulses and stop comparing the kids in a negative way.

Provide the opportunities to explore their Interests and talents:

Always try to provide various experiences and opportunities to kids, so that they can explore their hidden talents. Don’t push them into the extra classes after school, without really understanding their preferences. The interests and talents vary from child to child. They form the basis for their future life as well. So that’s the reason why we shouldn’t push our interests on to the kid.

Every Child is Unique

Celebrate your Child:

Always celebrate your child’s successes and failures without really admonishing. Also, give them tools and techniques to hone their skills.

So, as a parent, it’s our job to just show the right pathway for the child so that he can use his talents and interests to succeed in future life.

This post is powered by #CauseaChatter and #BlogchatterA2Z under the category of “Mental Health of Kids” by Blogchatter. You can read my earlier posts here.

25 Comments

  1. I agree, Suhasini..each child is unique. There cannot be any similarity . You can never slot them into one group or give parental advise. Every kid has their own set of quirks and habits. Moms can just steer them towards the right direction.

  2. Totally agree, every child is unique and we as parent should never even compare them. Good to read that they are different based on temperaments, strengths, weaknesses, as well as learning styles. We need to understand their individual qualities and loved all your tips to celebrate their uniqueness.

  3. I agree dear it is very important to celebrate uniqueness of our child. each child has some unique talent and as a parent we should try to encourage that rather than making usual comparison.

  4. That’s absolutely true!! Even though we agree to the fact that every child is unique, we start comparing our kids to others’ at some level. Let’s take a woe to celebrate their uniqueness, so that they can flourish independently.

  5. Comparing our kids with others can hamper their uniqueness and is a classic mistake that many parents make. Let them find their wings and their own space in the sky.

  6. I agree with you Suhasini.. It is easy said than done. As a parent just saying my child is unique and not accepting the fact does more harm to kids. Talking negative about them in front of them demotivates them to the core. So we need to act like a responsible parent and follow your pointers.

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mommyshravmusings

Welcome to my Parenting blog, which captures my parenting journey with Shrav. Also, I list down the books I read and review here.

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